2009 PREDICTIONS: Part 1

1) The FCC will approve the use of Sex robots provided they use haptic technology, because of growing concerns about hygiene. You can look at the robot, but you can't touch-it. Touch-screens are cool, but–um, everyone keeps touching them–icky.

2) .com might become the second highest TLD behind China's .cn ( what does this mean? Well, more people will buy/register .cn domains over .com )

3) Apple introduces some sort of search engine, for the iPhone, but its called something different and introduced as something else. It will take us 6 months ( after we've accepted it and *love* it ) to figure out what this means for the search market. Remember, the iPhone is a browser. iPhone visits to my blog are up 13%. I've also received visitor's using their Playstation and their Wii.

4) Web pages designed outside of the Flash authoring environment will be scalable. When a user resizes a browser window buy dragging one of the corners, the content will scale proportionately to the size of the browser window... phones, PDAs, netbooks, etc.

5) Hypervisor = Skynet, watch your asses.

6) Social networking goes analog. People will start meeting other people in bars, restaurants, book stores, cabs, clubs, schools, grocery stores, street corners, buses, restrooms, movies, flower shops and other telluric hotspots. They'll exchange information, share stories and look to establish communities of thought that are centrally focused around each individual's unique perspectives. Unfortunately a nasty trend emerges as a result, people are wearing pictures of their avatars, as a mask. Its creepy and I hope it doesn't last to long.

7) One major broadcast network will successfully make the transition to a web portal, unlike some–who simply bought one. Redundant, useless content will make it's way online and people will finally figure out that the terms streaming and broadcasting are defined buy the end-users, not a plastic, metal, square-ish box with a reflective face that transmits images and sound to the world. Users will continue to circumvent this intrusive content.

8) My mom and you're mom will admit they've facebooked each other.

9) Start-ups, in some innocuous sector, will develop a system of valuation and expenditure that equalizes cost and profit across their immediate profit margins, distributing the money evenly across their respective network. This will probably take place outside of the technology sector, but of course, will use technology to make it happen. This also eliminates the need for a bank.

10) I'll use this pick-up line; Nice blouse, your sleevage is amazing.

11) One of the big four ad networks will purchase a gaming company. Or–OlgivyOne starts developing websites with a Saas mentality, in effect, making branded RIA that exceeds the widget or applet. We'll need it, the retail environment isn't dead. But this all happens when social networking collapses leaving the very first open-opt-in-human directory online, built entirely by other users. Rich reputations will build other rich reputations. ( my kids are going to hate/love what they discover about me-bleh. )

12) It is likely that, since content drives advertising, one of the big networks actually merges with one of the big broadcast networks. Or an earn-out occurs. And why not? Disney has been been doing it for years.

13) The One Laptop Per Child (OLPC) enters the browser market with a substantial hold. Think about it...

14) Google not only bites the hand that feeds it, but it slaps that mo' foo right upside the head with a swift dragon-kick to the right eye. And when that hand comes around to defend itself, Google Steven Segal's that elbow-snap-move and throw's a keyboard into it's jugular. And follows that move with some obscure pool ball that was coincidently in the meeting room. Apple sits in the back of the room with it's hands folded across it's chest, tapping one shoulder with an iPhone. WPP walks in as if nothing happened.

15) One Child with a Laptop hacks a network.
–what? They're fast learners–good for them!